31 May 2006

I Touch Myself?

I wonder if everyone knows the workings of an ipod? I was carrying many items at the airport and so while waiting for a taxi, I put my nano in the back-pocket of my jeans. It wasn't loud enough so I attempted to turn up the volume through the denim. Aside from the fact that it didn't work, I also took it out of my pocket to adjust the volume for fear that the middle-aged woman behind me (potentially mother of two) thought I was casually making sensual circles on my own ass in public.

The Rock Show, a re-juvenating experience

Back online after a toasty weekend. There is nothing more cathartic than a slower-paced weekend and a Tuesday morning wake-up to Fastball. ... My hardwood floors are supposedly gold - close enough. Ain't never gettin' cold indeed. Nope, I'll never go hungry-- I had a lot to eat at the music festival. Nope, I'll never go old and grey-- I went to the rock show... a re-juvenating experience!

I forgot how simple things could be out of the city... in a good way. I ate about five meals at the rock show, none of which required any sort of involved deliberation to order. "eh, we just got the chicken tender platter. time for a jumbo hot dog?" they came with fries. the kind you eat with ketchup... and maybe mustard if you are feeling saucy. not the belgian kind that requires an effortful decision. curry ketchup? horseradish cream? pesto mayo? onion-infused balsamic parmesan basil vinegarette? shortly before the dog and platter, we had exchanged few words: "it's damn hot out. let's look for funnel cake." and we did this all, slowly.

everyone at the show seemed more concerned with quality of life and living for the moment, splurging for the $10 cigar which may or may not have been used for other purposes, blowing up colorful balloons which may or may not have been used for other purposes. and even spending lots of money on super expensive food and beer that wasn't all that great only because it tasted good.

I was a dirtbag and walked around with my pants rolled up and nearly barefoot. (you should've seen the water after I washed the jeans). it was great! I enjoyed all the small nuances of not being in the city. ... a nice break!

speaking of simplicity, how about the language and format of this fine piece of elementary writing effort?

25 May 2006

Today's song is...

(aside from the infamous chords to kick-off all FIDDLE TUNES)...

gonn'live together,
knowing forever
that we
did it all
for the glory
of love!!!

- New Found Glory version of COURSE... complete with ::claps::!!!

24 May 2006

References VI, Washington, D.C.

I am trying to do work to the syncopated beat of the snare stuck in my head from the piece, "Washington, D.C." partially influenced by my trip for the upcoming weekend. It's so distracting!

W a-s-h i-n-g t-o-n, baby, D.C.!
W a-s-h i-n-g t-o-n, baby, D.C.!

Stanza 1:

Washington, D.C.
It's paradise to me
It's not because it is the grand old seat
Of precious freedom and democracy
No, no, no
It's not the greenery turning gold in fall
The scenery circling the Mall
It's just that's where my baby lives
That's all.


I currently have 69 posts on this blog thus far.

Aa discussed with a friend yesterday, "yes, it is amusing to be extremely juvenile."

23 May 2006

On Repeat, Dazed

"The sanest days are mad,
why don't you find out for yourself?"

Décalage horaire

So I totally jolted awake at about 3am last night and could not get back to sleep. At all.
You should try it. It is a super way to simulate jet lag. Several whom have heard this story predict that I will crash at about 2pm. We will see what happens!

Yes, it is after 4am. Yes, I need to go on vacation. Like, now.

21 May 2006

Confession III, Chronic Polychron

I can fully understand why some people get frustrated with me and my sometimes overly-flexible and seemingly uncommitting nature, especially because I also dabble on the other end of the spectrum with my neurosis. I would like for them to understand me better. And similarly, I would like to understand them better. I am speaking of the 'chronic' wars, a struggling battle between two sets of people who have completely opposite ways of functioning. I am a polychron. I almost always do lots of things at once. But I would like to try to be very deliberate in performing a task that I usually combine with others to gain a different perspective of time. I don't know if this is possible, but would be interested in experimenting. I guess I'll have to start by not juggling while blogging.

I studied a bit of this in a class, but did a quick Internet search out of curiosity after having not read anything about polychrons in a while. Here's what I found which I thought interesting:

... a white paper that proposed the following hypothesis surrounding polychrons:

Persons who are more polychronic (Polychrons) would be expected to be more likely to:
a.) reschedule activities in response to demands;
b.) think of other things while doing something;
c.) combine routine tasks to free time for important tasks;
d.) have a flexible schedule; that is, not planning exactly when to do each thing;
e.) want to do several things at a time; i.e., not consider it to be fun to do one thing at a time;
f.) break projects into parts; and
g.) often change from one activity to another during the day.


Perception of Time & Priorities: Polychronic vs. Monochronic (from hackvan.com)

Monochronic People
Do one thing at a time
Concentrate on the job
Take time commitments (deadlines, schedules) seriously
Are low-context and need information
Are committed to the job
Adhere religiously to plans
Are concerned about not disturbing others; follow rules of privacy and consideration
Show great respect for private property; seldom borrow or lend
Emphasize promptness
Are accustomed to short-term relationships

Polychronic People
Do many things at once
Are highly distractible and subject to interruptions
Consider time commitments an objective to be achieved, if possible
Are high-context and already have information
Are committed to people and human relationships
Change plans often and easily
Are more concerned with those who are closely related (family, friends, close business associates) than with privacy
Borrow and lend things often and easily
Base promptness on the relationship
Have strong tendency to build lifetime relationships

18 May 2006

Fascist Capitalists IV, World Travel

For a world that is working toward globalization, why is it so damn expensive to even get from one state to another?

16 May 2006

Gray II, If I wanted this weather, I'd have moved to Seattle

"... the rain drops... the rain drops... the rain drops, the rain drops... the rain drops... the rain drops, the rain drops, the rain drops..."

I will pay everyone a quarter for each repetition of "the rain drops" they are willing to buy out of my head so I can quit singing it and focus on what I need to be doing. Bidding starts now!

Actually, make that a dime. That phrase must be repeated at LEAST 50 times in the song.

Bandwagon Venting III, Pieces of Shit

Not just one, but BOTH my computers are such pieces of shit right now. And add my no-good printer to the mix. It's like I typed up over 20 pages of notes for my own health and not to print out and read.

On a similar note... it's a good thing my G-string is broken, else I'd be screwing around right now. As in, the G-string on my guitar, sicko.

I don't think I can do another 4am-er. My only thought comfort is that perhaps someone else might also be Sensing Some Dread at the moment?

Fascist Capitalists III, The Crumbly Ceiling

No, it's not a reference to bureaucracy though sometimes I feel like pieces of that are being shaved off into my eyes too each time I look up to everyone who is more important. It's a reference to my bathroom ceiling, still a point of concern.

A Costa Rican boy named David lives upstairs now. I had a leak in my ceiling a couple of months ago when he moved in, but before that I hadn't had any problems for the many years that I've lived in this place (the kids are all grown up now). It has stopped leaking since, but I have a bad feeling it is a BLEVE waiting to happen. ... Look it up on the Internet.

He says he practices scuba diving upstairs. Do you think he would mind if I asked him to not fill up the tub as much before he gets in with his tank and flippers?

15 May 2006

Bandwagon Idiot

Picture from The Economist.

"This tastes like the green M&M... I'm sure of it this time."

14 May 2006

References V, Return of The Jewel

Coincidence. Somewhat related to References III, posted 19 april 2006 when my overly-inquisitive mind questioned the whereabouts of The Beloved Jewel. Readers, please reference Sense of Dread's 12 may 2006 post for the unfortunate answer. The link is coveniently listed to your right.

Movement III, Changing the Titles

My anti-climactic epiphany is that the titles of this blog are getting too damn confusing. My personal thought process is slightly distorted in filing and categorizing things in my head so it makes sense to me, but I admit that I would prefer to have specific titles for easier reference. Otherwise it's like if multiple artists were to names their albums I, II, III, IV, V...

Bandwagon Love Profession

interesting wordplay, isn't it?

13 May 2006

Bandwagon Willies II

I happened to hold my mug under my lamp and when I looked down into my Brita water, I saw a bunch of brown junk floating around the bottom. Some of it was suspended in the water like that nasty Orbits / Orbitz drink that came on and off the market, like, 5 years ago. The good news I guess is that I changed the filter not too long ago. So maybe it's just that black stuff from it. Which, I always wonder why it's there. Maybe to discourage lazy people from changing the filter too often because it's such a taxing process. Anyway, the bad news is that maybe my filter isn't working right and my Brita has essentially turned into a pitcher for liquid E.coli

12 May 2006

Bandwagon Theory

You are in the bathroom with another guest, and they are "a step ahead of you." It is guaranteed that as they are leaving and you are coming out of the stall, they will turn around to see who you are. This can be done subtlely (as they are pulling the door open, they will angle themselves such that they can take a glimpse). Or conspicuously (full 360-degree pivot). They don't like the disadvantage of the situation-- the subjection to the brief panopticism where you can watch them and be able to identify them in the near-future without their being able to identify you...

Illusion II

I am starting to see double. ... and it is not from a night out on the town.

11 May 2006

Bandwagon Venting II

When I talk to him, I can't help but think to myself: "F*ck, dude! I finished your sentence FOR you like 3 years ago."

"He's like Rainman... without the Math skills."

Bandwagon Chatter VI, Part Deux

For the record, I am aware that the Era of Yankee Ingenuity was not simultaneous to the Roaring 20's.

Bandwagon Chatter VI

I literally haven't shutdown my laptop in over, like, two weeks. That is nothing! And it is getting SO slow. Machines are starting to let me down.

Side question - I had discussed this with a friend before and I must credit her with the observation : why do adults call computers machines? (How do you punctuate that last question?) As in, "my machine isn't working." Or, "I have to load something onto my machine." Or, "I am getting a new machine." I picture a machine as just being something metal that works by itself and does something for you. Hello! we are out of the Roaring 20's and the Era of Yankee Ingenuity. Stop using that word!

10 May 2006

Bandwagon Bloopers III

About two weeks ago, I saw a man so unkempt I almost dropped a quarter in his coffee by mistake. That would have been embarrassing. I saw him again today.

08 May 2006

Nostalgia II

It is coincidental that the first Nostalgia post pertained to my sudden desire to put on a smock. Because this post is about art class, inspired by a conversation earlier this evening that took a dead-end turn down Memory Lane. At first, I had wanted to write about how f*cked up my elementary school art teacher was-- how you would wait in line next to the table of skinned animals and rotten shellfish without knowing quite what to expect. You were lucky if she was in a good mood and pulled you closer to her to show you how to color your ocean waves purple. Her breath was rancid, recognizable to me even at the young age of eight but I became well-ept at breathing at the right moments to avoid tasting it. So by that same token, you were lucky if she deafeningly chastised you from two feet away about how you didn't press hard enough. Or stay in the lines well enough. "Shutup, bitch! You try." (That is my translation into Adult Language). The crayons were slippery and waxy, large and unmanageable.

Anyhow, as I contemplated my post while tossing about in bed from the kilo of Hawaiian Supremo I had at around 6pm (yup, it's well-after 2am), my thoughts digressed and I started to have other flashbacks. I laughed to myself for a good 10 minutes-- again, probably due to the kilo-- and finally acquiesced [um, with myself] to sit and post.

Conversation was provocative at the art table. Like, when we would have ridiculous gossip and listen to Shauna* talk about how she made "How To" home sex videos while her mom laughed. Yes, she actually was quite a normal person. She was always quick with dry-humor, usually used in a caustic way to hurt people's feelings. One time, she nonchalantly stopped coloring in the middle of a conversation we were having about people's parents and said, "Josh - your mom looks like she's pregnant." His pushed through his lisp : "That's so mean!" I'm not sure if I laughed really hard because of her comment. Or because of the pause that took place between her comment and his. Or because of the expression on his face. But it was funny. It still is.

Yup, it disjointedly ends here. The rest of this story has been erased as it was judged by some pre-readers to be too controversial. I apologize for the inconvenience.

* Some names have been changed to protect the unsuspecting.

07 May 2006

Confession II, Part Deux

Damn, I'm thirsty. It can't possibly be from the half-stick of pepperoni that I had two hours ago, the lox I had this morning, everything else that was salty during my day... coupled with two large cups of coffee and other intensely caffeinated beverages that have far from hydrated me.

Okay. Yes, the actual confession portion of this post is that I keep logging onto my blog to procrastinate by interacting with myself. That's how much it means to me, NOT to do this reading. Said like: "110%! I will give you a 110% of what we make at the door. That's how much it means to me, NOT to hear you play." -JC, High Fidelity

Untitled II

And I walk home
Having learned twice as much.
Void of gestures, of words, of looks, of such.
Ever resistant--
to your half-hearted touch.

Confession II

Ref: Confession; 22 April 2006

Evidence: This will be my third dis-jointed post in a span of approximately 7 minutes. Stay tuned for approximately 3 more... give or take.

Bet III, Part Deux

I cannot retire.

References IV

I don't think
that I have got the stomach
to stomach
calling you right now.

- Saves the Day

06 May 2006


Today is the day.

My co-bookie and I are considering the following prospects :

Sinister (Ref: Bet; 17 April 2006)

Sharp Humor

Private Vow

Brother Derek

We plan to scam all of our friends by betting on the aforementioned horses... and by strongly urging them to not bet on the aforementioned horses. I plan to retire today.

Umm... so what time is the race? ... And how do we bet?

04 May 2006

Bandwagon Hypotheticals

You are away on business. Your boss to whom you do not report directly asks if you want to get a drink because he happens to be coming into town one night while you are there. It is clear that it is a casual thing, and that he might possibly already have plans so he is not sticking around waiting for you. You agree to it, and decide that you will both be in touch later that day that he gets into town.

That day, he asks you if you can still meet up. He proposes a time that is fairly early in the evening for going out. You have a dinner appointment, so you tell him that you won't be back by that time, but probably 1 - 1.5 hours later. He suggests you call him on his cell if he is not at the hotel bar.

You get back to the hotel much later than anticipated at around 10:30pm. You reluctantly do a sweep of the hotel bar for fear that he will be there with at least 11 other men talking about golf who are decently inebriated by that hour. He is not there. ... Do you call his cell?

Addiction IV

02 May 2006

Bandwagon Venting

My anticipated self-reaction to this post is simple : heartless, juvenile, unwarranted. But if somehow, someone who is reading this can answer my question convincingly, I will gladly remove this post which I expect to depict a harshly judgmental person who should be shamed for scrutinizing the socially inept. So here it is : How does someone grow up to be annoying? The question is Simple. Prosaic. ... Challenging. There are people who are annoying for various characteristics they might have-- like being overly-chatty, or loud, or officious... but what about those folks who don't have one particular overriding annoying quality? Any manner you would attempt to describe him/her leads down the road to the word "annoying". You feel bad. You feel judgmental. But you feel good in a way. And even better with each additional hint of convinction in your voice when you announce it : "He's a-NNOYING."

I have recently had intensified encounters with someone who has such an incredible talent to be annoying, it makes my skin ache. It radiates like the Doppler-effect as he approaches to initiate conversation at a party to the point where your brain pulsates like a loud firedrill test on a day when you're hungover. You just can't escape.

This has made me a smarter person-- more elusive, more sly, more flexible-- I find myself thinking of ways to get out of interactive situations. Even hypothetical ones that would never happen. (Or could they? since he has a tendency to just show up in unexpected places).

For example:

"Wanna play catch?"
"... Sure."
I then sacrifice my pride of being a decent athlete by throwing the ball very hard and very off-target so that it goes rolling down the flat field with unchaseable momentum. I lie down in the grass and rest some. Approximate buy time : 10 minutes.

"Surprise, I am sky-diving on your plane too!" He pops out from behind a large backpack.
"... Great."
On the way down, I risk my life by pulling my chute 5,000 ft higher than I should so I can drift in the middle of the sky for about a mile longer. Approximate buy time : 1 hour.

"Want to be in my insurance- company- simulation group?"
"... Okay."
I volunteer immediately to play the role of the broker and leave the table to "generate business". Approximate buy time : How much time is alotted to the group activity?

"Do you wanna get a drink?"
"... Sounds good."
I offer to get the drink but passively wave two quarters at the bartender to get her attention so that she does not help me. I act impatient. He comes over to ask what is taking so long and I suggest that he give it a try as he might have better luck. I step far off to the side so as to not get in the way. Approximate buy time : 15 mins + 7 mins = 22 mins.

01 May 2006

A Soliloquy

I leaned in and said quietly, just above a whisper, "What is the Chef's Daily Special today?"

"Let's see now... hold on... sautéed jumbo shrimps with asparagus butter cream, garlic, parsley, _________, over a bed of orzo. ... wait a minute, what's that?? sautéed jumbo shrimps with... oh, so I guess that is the special. The shrimps. And then orzo-- I don't know what THAT is."

"Oh, it's a type of small pasta."

I go with the roast chicken... because she does not eat seafood and thus doesn't recommend the salmon.

"Do you have sparkling water?"

"Yes we do! We have Perrier which is the smaller bottle. And then the larger is the Pinot Grigio*."

"Uhh... I'll take the larger, please..."

*To clarify-- the Pinot Grigio would have a better effect if written as "Pinogrigio" which I had initially wanted to do, but I was fearful that readers would think me stupid. Though, I guess if my readers were to be unsuspecting of intentional misspelling, I would want to put up a firewall to block their access to this blog anyway.

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